HBO "Thin" -Real Life is More Painful

Over the Thanksgiving holiday I saw some pals from college. One of my friends lives far away and I get to see her about once a year. My friend had bulimia in college----and still fights that battle, twenty years later. Call me shallow but when I was in college, it was not that big of a deal to be anorexic or bulimic. Nearly everyone I knew was on diet, a lot of people had done the "scarf and barf" method of weight loss prior. WT Campers---I am not saying it was right, I am just telling you the way it WAS. At the sorority ( "Delta Delta Delta-Can I Help You Help You Help You") the bathroom by our chapter room was for "Scarf and Barf". It was widely known and accepted that the chapter room restroom was pretty much just for the sisters that barfed up their food. Insert dorm or sorority---it was pretty common everywhere. There is a point here. The point is that the weight/thin issue has been on my mind a lot lately.

• I have an almost 13-year-old girl who is not "concentration camp" thin----and I have trouble finding her clothes!
• I have an 8 year old that can wear a size SMALL---for Women's t-shirts!

The documentary that is on HBO has brought a lot of this to the forefront and gotten people talking. But when I saw my friend from college...I just have to tell you that it just HURTS ME TO SEE HER STRUGGLE WITH IT STILL. My friend is accomplished. She has a beautiful family. She is a wonderful giving person. If she could only see herself how others see her...she would realize that she's beautiful inside and out. I know she is still struggling with bulimia (even though she tells me she's fine, tells others she is "over it") I can tell BY HER TEETH. Her teeth are discolored and it is one of the telling signs of someone that is throwing up alot. I know that her obsession and illness is going to take her from this world earlier than she should go. Throwing up on a consistent basis is not healthy and this will do her body harm in ways that have not shown up yet. You can't do that kind of damage to the body without harm. I know this is a rant but I am just so sad. I wish things were different. I wish something could be done so that so many women did not feel the pressure to be perfect, thin. Does anyone have any ideas, thoughts, opinions? Help me try to come up with some positive ways to combat this trend. I can't just sit and watch anymore.

HBO+Thin Bulimia Weight+Issues THIN+Documentary

Only a Friend Would Dress Your Kid Like a Hooker

Only a best friend would dress up your child like a hooker. We spent part of the weekend with some of my best friends-----I've known these friends since I was 5. I am now 43. Do the math and you'll come up with years of dysfunction, fun and laughter. One of these BF's is Godmother to my youngest daughter. These two women and their families are considered family by my kids and it was great to see them. There is only one drawback. My friends have no young girls. One BF has a college age daughter. The other BF has a son in 4th grade. Therefore, it is way fun for them to play dress up with "Miss Minnesota", my 8 year old daughter. Miss Minnesota is now the proud owner of a pair of black high heels with a "peek a boo" toe. She wears them 24/7. She tried to wear them yesterday to 5 o'clock mass. I was so proud. Did any of you experience family fun like this? Spill it sisters.

Pug Bowling

Pug Bowling is a great time waster! I am a pug owner and pug addict. But this video clip is toooooo funny, even if you are not a pug addict. Go here to see PUG BOWLING. No pugs were harmed in the making of this clip. Watch entire thing----it's worth it. pug+bowling, pug, animals, dogs, funny, you tube

Pottery Barn versus Reality-Thanksgiving Craft

Dear WTMs, I journey once again into my love/hate relationship with Pottery Barn. Today's "PB vs Reality Moment" is Pottery Barn Kids Thanksgiving Craft. Per the "PBK" website, those zany folks want you to spice up your kid's holiday table with homemade centerpieces! According to "PBK" it helps the children feel involved and gives them something to do! I can't imagine a more stressful way to kick off the holiday than to give children glue and scissors before the meal. White Trash Mom has some questions for the peeps at Pottery Barn Kids regarding the nifty craft idea:

• Who is going to take little Tommy to the ER after Molly pokes him with the scissors?

• If they kids want to be involved, why not involve them in cleaning the guest bathroom before company arrives? Guest bath is currently a Barbie pool so taking the naked Barbies out of the sink would be nice.

• If kids want something to do, why not have them help Mom and Dad with the Thanksgiving meal? Or at least get Uncle Bob a beer from the frig while he watches the football game?

• Glue before a meal? If they eat the glue, they won't eat their dinner.

• What do you suggest when the newly created centerpiece becomes a football?

• My nephew thought it would be funny to make the turkey anatomically correct. Would you like to take a photo of his centerpiece for next year's catalog?

• Do you have any other completely insane suggestions from LALA land?

If you want to read more about the "PBK" craft idea, please click on today's blog entry title. If you can't tell, I think a craft centerpiece created before the meal sounds like a slice of HELL. Please tell me what you think. Am I negative? Wrong? Anyone? Bueller?

White Trash Mom Holiday Shortcut #1

Design Mom has given us a shortcut to having the kids make holiday cards. Design Mom's tip is right here. Besides saving us time and effort, Design Mom has given us another tool in our WTM war with the "Muffia"! Can you imagine how upset the muffia moms will be when you, the WTM, send out your Christmas cards with awesome kid artwork? It just puts me in a holiday mood!

Spam Burrito for Pesky Relatives

Dear WTMs, Are you dreading the holidays more than usual this year? Are you stuck with unwanted house guests (your 2nd cousins, your senile uncle and his 3rd wife)? White Trash Mom has the answer! Make sure these annoying family members don't stay at YOUR HOUSE next year! How, you ask? It's simple. Feed them really BAD food. You don't have to be mean or make your home a pigpen---just have two or three days of really bad chow and they'll be sure to call your SISTER next year! One excellent recipe to drive away the free loading relatives is....the popular Spam Breakfast Burrito. YUM! More recipes coming as we count down to Thanksgiving...WT style!

                          SPAM BREAKFAST BURRITOS
 
Recipe By     :
Serving Size  : 6    Preparation Time :0:00
Categories    : Main Dish                        Breakfast

  Amount  Measure       Ingredient -- Preparation Method
--------  ------------  --------------------------------
   1       cn           SPAM Luncheon Meat, cubed
                        -(12 oz)
   4                    Eggs
   2       tb           Milk
   1       tb           Butter or margarine
   6                    Flour tortillas (6")
   1       c            Shredded Cheddar cheese,
                        -divided
   1       c            Shredded Monterey Jack
                        -cheese, divided
                        CHI-CHI's Salsa to Taco
                        -Sauce

  Heat oven to 400'F. In bowl, beat together SPAM, eggs,
  and milk. Melt butter in large skillet; add egg
  mixture. Cook, stirring, to desired doneness. Fill
  each tortilla with SPAM mixture and half of cheeses.
  Roll burrito; place seam side down on 12x8" baking
  dish. Sprinkle remaining cheese over top of burritos.
  Bake 5-10 minutes of until cheese is melted. Serve
  with salsa.

Pottery Barn Versus Reality During the Holidays

Dear WTMs, I pick on Pottery Barn. I especially pick on PotteryBarnKids. I am a hypocrite that I rant about PB & "PBK" since I also covet their products. There is a point here. The point, dear WT Readers is that while I want their stuff and I am a card carrying member of the PB customer club, PotteryBarn and Pottery Barn Kids represent the retail side of the PERFECTION MYTH. The big lie. You know what I am talking about. The lie that all of us modern women got spoon fed during the "women's lib" years...that you can "have it all" AND that you can have it all while you:

• make buckets of money
• are concentration camp THIN
• bake homemade bread
• design craft projects for your kids
• speak Mandarin Chinese fluently
• romp like a sex kitten with your man

I don't blame Pottery Barn for the big lie. However, I would like to point out the following Pottery Barn Versus Reality Holiday Moment. Today's "PB vs Reality Moment" is the picture of the PBK perfect Thanksgiving table for the kids. Picture from PBK shows the children laughing and playing at the festive and fun decorated table for the children (all the perfect adults are in the other room, with Norman Rockwell). It's perfect, it's wonderful...it's a complete and insane fantasy. Here is why it's a fantasy:

• None of the children are picking their noses
• The children are not squabbling
• All kids have clean, non stained clothing
• None of the older kids are trying to sample Uncle Jack's "toddy"
• There is no dog nearby getting fed under the table
• No children are whining
• No one is sick (there is always a sick one, every holiday)
• And finally---the plates and utensils actually match.

Anyone? Bueller? What am I missing? Chime in! thanksgiving PotteryBarn whitetrashmom

Center for the Prevention of Shopping Cart Abuse

Dear WTMs, Mondays stink. Here is a really stupid website that might bring a smile to your Monday. Center for the Prevention of Shopping Cart Abuse.

Watch Out Pet Food Pranksters!

Dear WTMs, Read in the news about a guy that sued for $2.7 million because someone tricked him and served him dog food as a prank. While I am not trying to take away from this man's situation (sounded like more than just a prank), this $2.7 million dollar verdict strikes FEAR into my WT heart because of all of the MEOW MIX incidents that I have masterminded and been a part of over the years. Confession time. It's pretty clear I am a little immature since I named my blog White Trash Mom. But what you don't know is that I have, on many occasions, tricked people into eating MEOW MIX by mixing it with CHEX mix...As a JOKE, a prank, a lark. Starting in childhood, we would regularly do this to my older brother and his friends. Fast forward to college and adult life----this practice continued even into my late 30's! I had a client that I worked with for many years, that was almost as immature as I was. Therefore, we would regularly prank eat other, with the "Meow Mix-Chex Mix" as one of my standards. This means that NOT counting my brother (due to the sister-brother NO SUE clause) that I could be sued by a number of my brother's friends, various sorority sisters, friends and even my former client. Clearly I need to start raising my legal fund NOW. Are there any other PET FOOD PRANKSTERS out there? Confess now and let's help each other raise money for legal aid.

Dysfunctional Family Letter Generator

Dear WTMs, I know it's far too early for WTMs to be thinking about holiday cards. However, I found this on DIGG----The Dysfunctional Family Letter Generator. An excellent way to waste time and laugh. And not too far from the truth---am I right? Enjoy my sisters in WT! Go here to waste time!

Trust but Verify-Kid Sick Days

Dear WTMs, As I have mentioned before, the idea of "Trust but Verify" is a big part of my parenting philosophy. The phrase "Trust but Verify" was used by The Gipper, President Ronald Reagan, when talking about the evil Red empire of the Soviet Union. President Reagan said that he TRUSTED them...But he did not trust blindly. He checked up on them. I find this phrase helpful in parenting. As a youngest child of the family, I was able to weasel out of many things. As a former "weasel" child, I am a natural skeptic when it comes to sick days for my kids. My younger daughter is home sick today. She was up and down last night with an upset stomach and a bad headache. Gave her kid Tylenol and let her sleep on the couch downstairs. However, this AM, I tried to "break" her. Sure, she said she was sick----but I applied just a little pressure to the situation to see if it was a scam. Naturally, we lost the thermometer (again) so I could not check the fever. Dig if you will, my version of "Trust but Verify": "Trust but Verify" Sick Day Treatment: WTM: So...You're sick today? You don't feel any better this morning? Miss Minnesota/Margarita: Yup. WTM: You know if you miss school today, you can't go to SusieQ's house Tuesday for that playdate? (Please note: I am not that harsh---this is a ploy to see just how sick she is) Miss Minnesota/Margarita: I know, I don't care. WTM: And you know you are going to have to stay in your room most of the day, no TV. (Note: As if! Again, this is a tool to get the truth) Miss Minnesota/Margarita: Yup. Usually by the second or third question, the girls will either "break" and confess that they are not that sick OR if they don't, I can see that they really ARE sick. This ends the interrogation. What do you guys do to determine "sick day health"? Would love some tips from other WTMs. They are smaller and younger and smarter than us.

Duct Tape as a Babysitter?

Dear WTMs, Another story about a great American mother.

Quizlaw brought a news story to my attention. Quizlaw is a great blog, if you don't read it.

The story-There was a recent Florida incident where a mom used DUCT TAPE her kids together while she went to work. Another case study for mothers that should not have kids. Luckily, neighbors heard the crying children and called the police. You can read the story of this mother of the year by clicking on today's title "Duct Tape Babysitting".

The incident is scary and horrid enough...but my peeps at Quizlaw (always twisted) began offering the QUIZ LAW BRAND BABYSITTING TAPE.

I am not laughing at child abuse. But the "duct tape as a babysitter" is so wrong...and so stupid that it is a ripe subject for dark humor. Anyone? Bueller? And is it me or do more of these incidents seem to happen in Florida?

The Mommy Blog-Melinda Roberts

Dear WTMs, One of our own is a published book author! Melinda Roberts, who writes THE MOMMY BLOG, has a new book out! Book is called MOMMY CONFIDENTIAL: Adventures from the Wonderbelly of Motherhood. Melinda was really helpful when I decided I wanted to write a "WTM" book. You can read more about the book, go to an online store to purchase it HERE. The last email I got from her, she said that AMAZON.com was going to start selling MOMMY CONFIDENTIAL in November. I just wanted to do a post about my friend as I think it's great. Check out the book and her blog!

New Fun Friends at the New School!

Dear WTMs, Are you with me on the magnet? I have some excellent news from my daughter's new school. She is doing great, making friends and is very happy. Let's chalk one up for the home team. I have even found some potential mom friends that I think I could hang with! It's not like that is a priority in picking a school but it does help to have some buddies so that I can get the lay of the land at the new school AND it's just nice to have friends. I don't dare say it...don't dare hope...but I think they could even be...WHITE TRASH MOMs. I don't want to get all psyched up yet. It's still early and I am still pretending that I am relatively normal. CLEARLY have not spilled the beans on the WTM blog yet. Will keep you updated.

Catholic Holy Day-All Saints Day

Dear WTMs, I am Catholic and today is a Holy Day (All Saints Day). In my own WT way, I am being a good Catholic by sharing with you a recent Catholic joke I received from one of my best friends. You Catholics will enjoy this one: SITTING BEHIND A COUPLE OF NUNS AT A Detroit Red Wing Hockey GAME (WHOSE HABITS PARTIALLY BLOCKED THEIR VIEW), THREE MEN DECIDED TO BADGER THE NUNS IN AN EFFORT TO GET THEM TO MOVE. IN A VERY LOUD VOICE, THE FIRST GUY SAID, "I THINK I'M GOING TO MOVE TO UTAH , THERE ARE ONLY 100 NUNS LIVING THERE." THE SECOND GUY SPOKE UP AND SAID, "I WANT TO GO TO MONTANA , THERE ARE ONLY 5O NUNS LIVING THERE." THE THIRD GUY SAID, "I WANT TO GO TO IDAHO , THERE ARE ONLY 25 NUNS LIVING THERE." ONE OF THE NUNS TURNED AROUND, LOOKED AT THE MEN, AND IN A VERY SWEET, CALM VOICE SAID, "WHY DON'T YOU GO TO HELL . THERE AREN'T ANY NUNS THERE." Those of you who had any contact with nuns during your school years KNOW just how true to life this joke is. Clearly those Red Wings fans were NOT Catholic! Happy All Saints Day.