Christmas Lights Still Up & Does God Really Want Me to Pay $150 for a First Communion Dress?

Dear WTMs, It is "Day 60" in the Christmas Light Standoff with the WT husband. Would trade Trashy Princess for her dude but I don't think she (or he) would think it was a good trade. The Christmas lights are still up. I no longer care about this fact due to the excellent advice given by my WT mom bloggers. If the lights stay up until St. Paddy's Day---I will break down and pay the kid across the street to take them down. Right now, it is just my own "sick" little waiting game. Will he do it without me nagging him to do it? How long will this take? A side note to this: Our neighbor across the street told me that she was able to sell her home "DESPITE the Christmas lights being up in FEBRUARY". I am so relieved. On to the important quest: First Communion. My second grader will have her First Communion in two months. Does God REALLY want me to pay over $150.00 for a dress? My older daughter's dress was ruined in a basement water leak at our old house so a hand me down is OUT. Keep in mind that my younger daughter is the one that made me look all over the internet (and nearly got me "hotlined" by Child Services) by looking for an EVENING GOWN for her HALLOWEEN costume (Miss Minnesota). So naturally this kid likes the dresses that look more appropriate for the "cocktail" hour rather than the First Communion ceremony. I really don't know where she gets her need to be so fashionable since I only wear a dress about twice a year and spend the rest of the time in jeans. But, she is what she is and I love her so.....we have started the First Communion dress hunt. But I have not been able to find anything that is remotely appropriate and that "Miss Minnesota" wants to wear----for under $100.00. Am I missing something? Does God really expect me to shell out that much moola for a dress that will be worn only one day? I have tried the "HAND ME DOWN" thing and she is just older or just younger than the people I would get a dress from. So at the risk of being a bad Catholic----where do I find a nice First Communion dress that is reasonable and that is "fancy" enough for the future fashionista, Miss Minnesota?

8 Year Old Birthday Party-WMD

Dear WTMs, I have devised a new method of torture for bad people. As a WMD (WEAPON OF MASS DESTRUCTION), we should take any known bad guys and make them spend 2 to 3 hours with a group of eight year old girls. Before you get too upset, read on. Here is what I see---two bad guys (unarmed, naturally) chained to chairs in a room. While they are chained to a chair, a birthday party goes on around them. Birthday party consists of 20 eight year old girls. So we are clear---one room, two bad guys, TWENTY eight year old girls. Add in sugar, loud music by Hillary Duff (over and over) and some crafts....you have the answer for world peace, REALLY. Because if the evil ones spent a few hours enduring the kind of torture, I believe it would "break" them in a way that conventional methods have failed. Some of the reasons this torture is so bad:

• Have one little girl say the same thing over and over and over, 1 inch from their face. Very loud.
• Play the pop music right next to their ears. The tin, horrid sound will give them a splitting headache in 45 minutes.
• Have all of twenty participants ask the bad guys the same question, over and over. As soon as they answer the question, the next child will ask the SAME question. Do this until all 20 kids have asked the same question. Then...start it over and have the children do the same thing with a DIFFERENT question. DO this 100 times.

Sure, I am being dramatic but there is a little truth to my rant. I had a birthday party yesterday for my youngest daughter. I even had help from my 12 year old daughter and two of her friends. My older daughter, whom we lovingly call "THE CHAINSAW", was completely comatose last night after the party. My older daughter was given the nickname "CHAINSAW" at age 4, due to the fact that she has two speeds: off and on. There is no volume gage, there is no fast/slow-----this gal wakes up in the morning and starts. And she GOES FAST-----all day, all evening----until at night she DROPS. But I am getting away from the the point of the story-----the fact is that is takes a TON to wear out my older daughter. She is VERY high energy. Last night she went to bed at 9pm. Perhaps I am not a good mother or a person lacking in moral fiber. Perhaps I have a low tolerance for pain. Maybe I am old. But the party yesterday gave me a headache that I just now got rid of, 24 hours later. I slept until after 9am this morning. It drained the energy completely out of me. Call me a loser but these kids were nice kids, good kids at the party. But the sheer energy force just sucked the life out of my being for almost 24 hours. Am I a wimp or is this typical?